- Monday, 6 October 2014

"Life" in Tinder - PART 2 Extended

So, this is the first part of part two I wrote few days ago.
"This is a joke! So, I have finally met someone from Tinder and I am making business plans with that person and nothing else! I literally mean business, no dating or anything similar to that – not even a mixture of business and pleasure!
When I look for business, I get dates, and when I look for dates (which does not happen often), I get business!? How does that work out?
Hmmm life can be nonsense! Or is it?
The other guys I have been talking to in there are really not that fun. Some of them are ok – they know what jokes to tell to make you laugh, (these guys are good, even if they are copying and pasting the same message to all the girls!) But, the rest are either boring or tell you that they want to make love with you in the first text!?! It’s kind of disgusting, especially if you are not looking for that right away. They actually think sex with them may be better that by yourself!!! Hmmm, we will need to discuss."
One of the readers of the blog, requested a extension of this article and of course how could I not please my followers, well my follower, as he is probably the only one apart from my friends! ;) not that you are not friend Victor! lol
Anyway, here I am writing for someone that seems to like some of my articles :) Exciting times!
So yes, lets go point by point, karma or however you want to call it... Life, how does it work? We - personal development interested people, coaches, etc - focus on thinking, focusing in what you (we) want, right? We say, focus on what you want, so you can get it, you will attract it, or in a more practical way, you will just see it when it's in front of you, so the only way that can happen is if you are aware of it, it can be in front of you and you will miss it of not! Right? Makes sense? It´s like when you are going to buy a car, suddenly it is everywhere, is not exactly law of attraction, is it? Is more because it is in your head, your filters have changed so you can see it, because you are open to it and it´s constantly in your head.
So ok, that´s kind of clear, think of what you want and you will get it. But then, my first paragraph says:
"This is a joke! So, I have finally met someone from Tinder and I am making business plans with that person and nothing else! I literally mean business, no dating or anything similar to that – not even a mixture of business and pleasure!
What here? What is this???
We all know, the less pressure about things help people to get over them much easier. EXAMPLE! Some studies say, when people go to interviews that are not that important to them, meaning they don´t mind not getting the job, they perform much better! Why? Well having no pressure let their brain function better, be more free, more creative. So this is probably the same, too much pressure to find someone for business reasons may not be helping in getting it! "They" say (Don't ask who "they" are, come on!), stop thinking about the thing and you will remember what it was, like those times when you forget what you were going to say, and yes, it works! You stop thinking about what you were going to say but you just forgot, and the idea comes back to your mind by itself! 


As contradictory as black and white, right? Well we don´t need to go that far, as contradictory as our hormones!
How many times have you heard this, "I have never looked for a boyfriend and I always have one", or "as soon as I decide not looking for a girlfriend then I get one". I have heard it many times! MANY TIMES!
But then something else comes to my mind, obviously! Maybe it is the subconscious mind that wants me to get someone for business instead of dating!?!?!? Or who wants to get a girlfriend even if you consciously don´t know you want one? Or are not looking for one?Mmm God, this is becoming complicated now! So is it the non-existing pressure about finding a business partner which brings me a business partner? Or is it actually my subconscious mind working for me and focusing in on what I really want and following the first coaching theories...? Even if I think I don´t want that? Wow, yeah mmm okay...Do you mind if I change the topic?


 
"The Other guys I have been talking to in there are really not that fun. Some of them are ok – they know what jokes to tell to make you laugh, (these guys are good, even if they are copying and pasting the same message to all the girls!) But, the rest are either boring or tell you that they want to make love with you in the first text!?! It’s kind of disgusting, especially if you are not looking for that right away. They actually think sex with them may be better that by yourself!!! Hmmm, we will need to discuss."
What can I say about this, the first thing that comes to my head is, this is what I tell the guys I date for a long time, if you want to lie to me, that's fine, just do it well! Be smart enough because that will give you the right to keep dating me, as simple as that! If you are good enough to make sure I don´t find out, if you are good enough to make sure the time we spend together is quality time, here I am, well done! Congratulations! Who cares what you do in your spare time? I know how this sounds, but being realistic, the only thing we should care about is how good the time we spend together is, right? It's not that I want to have a liar next to me, I do like honest people, but if you lie well, what realistically can I do? Enjoy you, that´s all. The idea that people could be lying to you and there is nothing you can do to change that is something you have to accept.



So the same applies here in Tinder, if you copy/paste the same message to all the girls but you are fun... Well done, what can I say, you made me laugh.
And for those guys who ask for sex straight away... Here you are! Mobile App to go straight to the point, THE CONSEXUAL SEX APP, go for it!
For the boring ones... mmm maybe think what you would like the girl to tell you, so you can tell her that? Or, take it less seriously, or just stay as you are if you are happy with that! :)
Thank you for reading!
Nerea

NOTE: Sorry for the funny typing format that comes up, not sure how to short it out yet!

4 comments:

  1. I found really interesting the second part. I think that the women, focus too much about sincerity. I try to don't lie, especially with important issues, but I´m good, really good. And sometimes, specially at the beginning, when she doesn't know me so well, I find that some little lies, can help she to get the right impression, without many explanations and time.

    I never have had problems after I explain the reality, so I´m starting to think that the sincerity, is not what womans really want, I think that is more about security and have a healthy relation.

    Focusing exactly on what you explain, I think that is a healthy way to think. Jealousy, sometimes, is a bigger problem than cheating, and it also helps to you to focus on have quality time with your partner, which is what matters.

    Keep, working on the blog.

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    1. hahaha good comment Victor, come on don´t say you are a good lier!!! :P
      I would rather not to conquer someone with lies to be honest as you may end up with someone you dont really want. What I mean you want to find someone that respect you (the good & bad) and that can see your potential, you don´t need someone who like you because of the lies, right? Well just my opinion.

      In another side I would not base my decisions only in words as they can be not true but in ACTIONS! Words usually will be lost in the air.

      Jealousy = Insecurity, when you are confident about yourself, and happy on being by yourself if anything happens, jealousy does not come very often.

      QUALITY TIME is what definitely matters to me, more than anything.

      Thanks for cheering up about the blog!!

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  2. Regarding lying, I completely agree with you in so far as you should enjoy the moments you are together rather and that free time is exactly that, free time.
    However you should not condone lying, not openly, it is quite ironic I know, but it is better to lie about your not minding lying. It sends the wrong message otherwise, and messages are important.

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    1. heheh yeah publish that you are a lier I don´t think is the best option, but again actions say more than words and lies will fly in the air anyway.

      None (including me) like lies but I know people do it, so I would not make decisions based in words, lets say.

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